MIND your health

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Part I 

I am trying to grasp the ignorance and obliviousness that is still en-grained within our society when it comes to mental health and illnesses. Kate Spade’s suicide was a shock to many, and not much is known about her personal life. She paved the way for stylish hand bags, shoes, and accessories and letting women of all ages to Live Colorfully. As office chatter spread, I heard one of the most ignorant comments, “She sounds like a b---h, she had all this money, but it wasn’t enough.” I couldn’t even put words together, I was shocked, only to later hear “She was clearly done living, so there’s no reason to be sad” But there is, there is plenty reason to be sad… Because here we are yet again turning a blind eye to mental health and mental illnesses.

A few days later, we were shaken again, some think harder, by the suicide of Anthony Bourdain. A person who inspired others to travel, experience cultures, and to try various cuisines. 

Blame has been placed on the mother of his child, and numerous others. I tried my best to understand why someone would be so inconsiderate. You see, I just finished watching the popular yet controversial show 13 Reasons Why. I was hesitant to watch it at first, because I’ve heard it can be a trigger.

But all of this: Kate Spade’s Suicide, Anthony Bourdain’s suicide, and the show 13 Reasons Why could have very easily been a trigger for me. Yes, you read that correctly. The talk of, and depiction of depression, the negative thoughts, bullying, anxiety, anger, panic attacks could have all been a trigger for my own. 

Luckily, it wasn’t, and I am beyond proud of myself that none of this was a trigger. Instead I was able to take a step back and ask myself, why? Why is this happening in our day in age? Sadly, the answer is simple. Mental illnesses are still a hush-hush topic, it’s "taboo, it’s all in your head." We don’t talk about it like we should… I haven’t talked about it like I should.
Are we not talking about it because you don't want me to think about it or because you don't want to?

So, here I am baring it all, and sharing with you guys my story. The thing is, there are many layers to it. It’s going to take time, and it won’t be chronological, but I have to go all the way back to high school, when it all began in 2008. I knew something was wrong – but my sister is the one who knew I needed help. It was hard to reach out when I already felt like I had no voice. I thought asking for help made me look weak, but now I know asking for help is a sign of strength.

If you or someone you know is having suicidal thoughts, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8225) or text "help" to the Crisis Text Line at 741-74.